For too long I’ve filled my head with dreams of doing great things. It’s gotten to the point that the thoughts themselves eventually feel as though I’ve actually done something when really all I’ve done is daydream and yap ad nauseum without ever lifting a finger. Why? Well, the more I think of it the more I come up with laziness and fear as the reasons behind my otherworldly inertia. Laziness because it’s easier to dream than it is to do, and fear because I’m afraid of failure. With me, everything needs to be perfect, everything needs to be a success.
Well, I just turned 30 two months ago and, wakeup call, almost none of my grandiose dreams have materialized. Now I don’t know if it’s because people get all introspective and stuff when they mark a new decade or if the timing just happened to work out this way, but I’ve gotten to thinking, “you only get one shot at this life and when it’s over, it’s over, so what the heck are you sitting around wasting your time dreaming when you can be doing?!” And that’s exactly what I intend to do. I’ve had a lot of pet projects in my head and the only way they’re ever going to see the light of day is if I start to crack that door open and let a little sunshine in. And did you know that Bill Gates was the first person to become a billionaire at the age of 30?
To accomplish some of the goals I have (specifically in the web world) I’ll have to climb a few Everests. For starters, before I can even move on my ideas I’m facing learning curves that are just huge! In trying, I’ll likely fall flat on my face and fail several times, and spectacularly at that. But at this point I’d rather do that than spend another day daydreaming and boring everyone who’ll listen with stories and ideas that never see the light of day.
Now you may be asking why I’m writing all of this? Well, it’s partly for accountability through the fear of public humiliation. I’ve come out and shared my intentions, after a fashion, and will look like an idiot if I don’t at least do something. So here’s looking to the long, painful and sure to be frustrating, uphill road ahead that will hopefully yield some satisfactory results along the way.
It is not the critic who counts, not the one who points out how the strong man stumbled or how the doer of deeds might have done better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred with sweat and dust and blood; who strives valiantly; who errs and comes short again and again; who knows the great enthusiasms, the great devotions, and spends himself in a worthy cause; who, if he wins, knows the triumph of high achievement; and who, if he fails, at least fails while daring greatly, so that his place shall never be with those cold and timid souls who know neither victory or defeat.–Theodore Roosevelt, Twenty-sixth President of the U.S. 1901-1909
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